There’s a playground here in town that’s tucked away in a neighborhood, and if you don’t know where it is, it just might be impossible to find. One of the pieces of equipment is something completely out of the ordinary (at least as far as playgrounds go in town), and that’s what Henry is spinning around in in this picture. It’s this tilted bowl that spins around violently, and uses only the child’s weight to circulate itself. If I weren’t pregnant, I’d spin around in that thing like a crazy person. I would hog it, and not allow anyone else a turn.

Sitting at the playground, I thought about wearing my ring sling with the little lady inside, letting the cool December breeze waft through my cardigan. I thought about spending the afternoon at the park, packing along a picnic, and just being there…..the babes and me.

I often find myself daydreaming about having her here with us, about nursing her at the beach while Henry builds a sand castle (I daydream about nursing her because I know that’s what I’ll be doing for quite a while…and I can’t wait for that part).

And if I allow myself, if I let my mind wander to the places where even thoughts haven’t quite become insinuations or leanings yet, I see lots of babies…lots of us.

Making a family is the best thing I’ve ever done. It’s the only thing that means anything. My family is every dream I’ve ever had, and even the best ones I didn’t know existed. Papa and I, and all the babies that are…and the ones that will hopefully be.

Like spinning around and around on that playground ride….a life that’s full of things that you never want to end, things you never want to let go.

I just can’t wait.